Independence

I have recently realized that Mingli falls asleep better when he is laying down by himself than when I lay down with him.  If I lay down beside him he wants to either play or eat, but if he is laying down by himself he kicks for a few minutes and then falls asleep without any crying.  I know I should be happy, many parents would love a baby that they can just lay down in his bed and he would fall asleep within a few minutes without crying, and I am happy, but I miss my tiny newborn.  When Mingli was a newborn we would go to sleep together each night.  I would lay him down in bed beside me and he would fall asleep snuggles in my side.  New he is growing up, and it feels like he needs me just a little less.  The other day he was playing on his mat and I tried to get his attention, but he was too focused on his toys to pay attention to me.  The monkey hanging above him was more interesting than his mommy.  I hate how fast he is growing up.  I just want him to be little for a little bit longer.  I am quickly losing the days where I am everything to him, where I am the most important thing in his world.  I know he has to grow up, but it makes me so sad.

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