Being someone’s whole world

Recently I have realized that I am Mingli’s whole world.  Right now I am his source of food, love, warmth, comfort, safety, and many more things.  My breathing helps him regulate his, his heartbeat is better when I hold him, my body temperature changes to help him if he is hot or cold, if he is sick my body produces antibodies and gives them to him through my breast milk to help his body fight off the illness (after of course he coughs and sneezes on me and gives his germs to me).  He cries when I am not with him, and calms when I pick him up.  When I lay him down at night he will fuss, until I lay down next to him.  Then he cuddles up to me and falls right asleep.  I am everything to him right now.  Sometimes it feels like he is still connected to me, like there is an invisible rope still tying us together.  Sometimes it almost does not feel like we are completely separate individuals.  He is not ready to be separated from me, he still needs me.  It breaks my heart thinking that it will not be like this forever.  I want him to grow up to be independent, to be happy, but I panic thinking that I will have to let go of him.  I know that is what will make him happiest, though.


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